================== Communicating -- Inspirational Messages =============== by M.D. Smith -- Huntsville, AL ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- This program is designed to help you improve your communications skills. You can likely think of many cases where a communication was misunderstood and the results ranged from a bother to a full catastrophe. By improving your skills, your being understood will get better. The important thing in communicating is conveying a clear and understood message. By completing the questionnaire, you will see where you can improve on your skills. --------------------------------------------[ more ]----------------------- "People forget the words they hear you say... but they never forget how you made them feel." DALE CARNEGIE In communicating, your words might be correct when you are talking to someone, but if your expression, tone of voice and other body language tells them that you believe this person is a stupid moron, that is what they will remember. How a person remembers your conversation is far more important than the exact words you used. That is why it is so important that you get good feedback when you communicate and that you leave the person `feeling' OK about what was said. It is always beneficial to leave a person feeling good from a communication, even if it had to be a criticism. It is not an easy thing to do. That is why there are so few great communicators around. But the better we get, the greater will be our rewards for our improvements. --------------------------------------------[ more ]----------------------- Many years ago when the railroad tracks were being laid to connect the East and West, it was necessary to hire a great many workers and train them on the spot to build the tracks. One new foreman was instructing a brand new, not-too-bright, mountain man on the proper method to drive the spikes in the cross-ties." "Now watch me as I show you what to do", the foreman said as he handed the sledge-hammer to the mountain man and picked up one of the spikes. The foreman then knelt down by a fresh rail on the cross-tie, and placed the spike next to the rail and held it there. The mountain man was not paying very much attention as he propped himself up on the sledge hammer. The foreman was looking down at the spike he was holding in his hand as he called out to the trainee..... "O.K. now....when I nod my head...HIT IT !" Those were the last words the foreman ever uttered. Proper communications can avoid a lot of trouble. Making the assumption that just because YOU understand something, so will the other person, can have quite serious results. This is why getting proper feedback to your communications is necessary. A person must understand exactly what to do before they proceed to do it, resulting in better work and happier people. --------------------------------------------[ more ]----------------------- A man was walking by a hardware store in a small town and saw a sign in the window that read: "CAST IRON SINKS" "Heck," he said to his buddy, "any FOOL knows that !" Even words that we are sure are simple and have a clear meaning, CAN be misunderstood. Depending on what the receiver of our communication is thinking or what his education may be, the message understood may have very little to do with what we had intended. That is why it is so important to get good feedback when you communicate. However, when you request the feedback, it is very important not to insult the other person. Lay the blame on yourself and your abilities as to why you need to insure that there is no misunderstanding. --------------------------------------------[ more ]----------------------- "The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug." Mark Twain Not only is the exact word choice important when communicating, but the frame of mind of the receiver is just as important. You say to a woman who is in a very negative frame of mind:" "My dear, when I see you, time stands still !" .....and she thinks you are saying.... "MY FACE WILL STOP A CLOCK !" ....or you say...... "My, what a lovely dress you are wearing this evening." ...and she replies to you..... "What the heck was wrong with the dress I wore last night !" --------------------------------------------[ more ]----------------------- A FAILURE TO COMMUNICATE Colonel to his executive officer: "Tomorrow evening at approximately 2000 hours Halley's Comet will be visible in this area, an event which occurs only once every 75 years. Have the men fall out in the battalion area in fatigues and I will explain this rare phenomenon to them. In case of rain, we will not be able to see anything, so assemble the men in the theater and I will show them films of it." Exec to company commanders: "By order of the colonel tomorrow at 2000 hours, Halley's Comet will appear above the battalion area. If it rains, fall the men out in fatigues; then march to the theater where the rare phenomenon will take place, something which occurs only once every 75 years." Company commander to lieutenant: "By order of the colonel in fatigues at 2000 hours tomorrow evening, the phenomenal Halley's Comet will appear in the theater. In case of rain in the battalion area, the colonel will give another order, something which occurs once every 75 years." Lieutenant to sergeant: "Tomorrow at 2000 hours, the colonel will appear in the theater with Halley's Comet, something which happens every 75 years. If it rains, the colonel will order the comet into the battalion area." Sergeant to troops: "When it rains tomorrow at 2000 hours, the phenomenal 75-year-old General Halley, accompanied by the colonel, will drive his Comet through the battalion area theater in fatigues." At that point - - - NO FURTHER COMMENT ! --------------------------------------------[ more ]----------------------- "WISE MEN TALK BECAUSE THEY HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY; FOOLS BECAUSE THEY WOULD LIKE TO SAY SOMETHING." Plato "It's better to keep your mouth closed and be thought a fool..... than to open it and remove all doubt !" Mark Twain Certainly there are many times we think we know something to be a fact and we are wrong. It is better to not say anything at all much of the time, even if we are certain of a thing. Yes, even then, we should perhaps not be so sure. Benjamin Franklin, as a wise elder statesman, said that it was better to pose a question...or make a speculation to cause the other to think, but to never directly tell a person he was wrong. Communication is an art, done well, it is extremely beautiful. *************************[ end of messages ]*******************************